Monday 15 December 2014

33 Reasons Why Southern Nigerians are Fools - and the Northerners are not!


33 Reasons Why Southern Nigerians are Fools - and the Northerners are not!
By Eccentric Rowland
Sadly,80% of Southerners who see this article will not read it!
Note:This article was not developed to ascribe to the entire Northern Nigeria the selfish antics and machination of a few individuals who belong to the region. It would be unfair to do that. Also, this article was developed not with the intention of causing incitement...
1. An average Northerner acquires a cheap transistor radio-set in order to gain political awareness
from broadcasting structures such as BBC (Hausa Service),Radio Nigeria, etc.
This practice has made the region the most politically-aware region in Nigeria. On the hand, an average Southerner,typically, acquires expensive Smartphones equipped with FM radio receiving capability.Instead, they would rather listen to inane songs like “Your Waist”, “Skelewu”,“Ginger Your Swagger”, “NoGede”, etc.
2. Unlike the South, the North understands the importance of numbers in politics. This is why, by all strategic means necessary, the North ensures that they have alarger representation at the National Assembly.
3. Northerners don’t shout, scream, vent and speak “big grammar” to prove that they are politically intelligent on political programmes on TV and radio. Instead, they shout, scream, vent, kick, punch, taekwondo, etc on the floor of the National Assembly to promote a cause that is in their favour. The reverse is the case for the Southerners.
4. Southern graduates/job seekers consider the public sector (government institutions) an unfashionable place for employment.Meanwhile, the Northerners massively recruit and entrench themselves into the public sector and manipulate themselves up the ranks. While all these are going on, their southern brothers and sisters spend years languishing in the labour market for the elusive jobs in blue chip organizations. Yet, Southerners complain of marginalization in the public sector.
5. For some weird reasons, the South is always frightened when the North make political pronouncements. Even weirder - for some inexplicable reasons, Senators and House of Representative members from the South appear to be too timid to oppose their northern counterparts during legislative sessions.
6. According to the gospel of the North - the Northerners were born to rule. That is, leadership (of Nigeria) is their exclusive preserve. By extension, the Southerners were born to be led! Interestingly, certain actions of some Southerners support this belief.
7. The North has more (unrated) billionaires(in Dollars) than any region in Nigeria. For instance, a certain Alhaji Mai Deribe (an oil well licensee)would certainly laugh each time Forbes releases its ratings and his name is not listed.
8. The North doesn’t produce crude oil, but the Northern Senators had the temerity to oppose the 10% host community funds. The Southern legislators find nothing wrong in that, so long as it doesn’t affect their “constituency allowances”.
9. {Singing}Come and see Nigeria wonder! (2x)
Statistical absurdity of the grandest order is stating that Kano is more populous than Lagos! Dear friends, even science have proved from simple demographic distribution patterns across the globe that population increases as we move from the hinterland (desert/Savannah region) to the coast– but in the case of Nigeria, the North which lies in the arid zone, is more populous than the South – by a deviously doctored census report. Okay o! We dey look.
10. The North have ruled the country legally(democratically) and illegally (military) for 37 out of the 53 years. The South is very comfortable with this inequality.
11. The North is the chief proponent of the“quota system” and “federal character” principle – a system that was crafted to sacrifice merit on the altar of “national oneness”. In simple terms, even themost unqualified gets a slot in sensitive national projects.
12. Northern law-makers at the National Assembly- typically - rally amongst themselves to promote legislations that favours their region (e.g. pedophilic laws). Southern law-makers typically rally amongst themselves to promote legislations that will increase their salaries and constituency allowances.
13. To the Northerners - the census exercise is not just a statistical evaluation exercise. Instead, it is considered a key political exercise. Meanwhile, the Southern folks see census exercise as a temporal job opportunity for its largely unemployed undergraduates. In the words of Chief Festus Odimegwu (recently resigned Chairman of National Population Commission) “There has been no credible census in the country since 1816 because of manipulations”, Punch Newspaper, 18 October 2013.
14. When it comes to regional unity – religion,politics and language are the common uniting factor for the North. Southerners(especially the South-Easterners) are never united for any course. (Oh, well, Soccer sometimes offers some measure of unity among the Southerners!).
15. The North is the region with the least education, least resources, least development and pervasive poverty – yet, they have ruled Nigeria for 37 years out of the nation’s 53 years of independence.
16. Only the North understands the logic behind establishing a national refinery (the Kaduna refinery) thousands of kilometers away from the point of extraction of crude oil.
17. When it concerns the north, a new standard is always invented. For else, how does one explain how Sani Abacha – a near-midget –escaping the “standard height” rule of the military. Even, rising to be president.
18. The North conceived and sold the “Boko Haram” concept as a pointer to the fact that the South is incapable of ruling the country. The South has wholesomely bought the idea. “Yes, automatically Boko Haram will disappear if the north gets the presidency by 2015. I am sure”. Excerpt from the interview granted by Lawal Keita (2nd Republic Governor of Kaduna State) to the News magazine (October 2013)
19. An “instant enemy” of the northern region is any appointed public officer (especially a female one) from the south who has the temerity to oppose their common cause. Or, one that is standing as a clog in their continued dominance in the Oil & Gas/public sector. Some southerners gleefully and ignorantly join in the attack on some of these public officials.

20. Poverty, ignorance, lack of education,religious bigotry and fanaticism, etc are some very powerful tools needed to effectively manipulate/control people. The Northern oligarchy is very aware of this. Hence, their manipulation of the masses in the north (using these tools) for their selfish interest.
21. Of all the regions, the North is the least supportive of resource control, Petroleum Industry Bill (PIB), and the entrenchment of true federalism. The South finds nothing suspicious in that.
22. It is unbelievable to believe that some WISEMEN (in a certain political party) from the South were party to a bizarre arrangement for “power shift” or “power rotation” between the North and the South – when, clearly, the south is home to 2 major ethnic groups and - by far - more ethnic groups than the north.
23. The North offers the most opposition to the privatization of public (government) institutions. Opposition to privatization is principally to prevent the likely disengagement of their largely unqualified members. (BTW, till date, some people still earn salaries of close to N1m monthly from the comatose NITEL. Now guess what region most of these people are from? Note:This fact is verifiable.)
24. The South produces the crude oil (Nigeria’s economic mainstay). However, amongst the regions, the North owns majority of the oil blocks, oil prospecting (OPL) and oil mining (OML) licenses.
25. Northern leaders (political and religious)have never come out, unanimously, to publicly condemn the menace of Boko Haram. Southern leaders (political and religious) that publicly condemn the methods of Boko Haram attract criticisms and are described as self-seeking or seeking attention/relevance.
26. Political power means just one thing to the North – control of the nation’s economic mainstay (Petroleum resources). Little wonder they are vehemently opposed to the implementation of the Petroleum Industry Bill (PIB).
27. While the north was too busy attacking some Federal Ministers from the South for “ineptitude”, they failed to notice the atrocities of Northern Ministers who were on a mission to inflict callous disparity within the sectors they were meant to oversee.
Please, kindly check out the bizarre disparity in cut off points (quota admission) into the 104 Federal Government Colleges (FGCs) aka “Unity Schools”. It was published in January,2013, by the Federal Ministry of Education under the careful supervision of Prof. Ruqayyah Ahmed Rufa’i - a “once upon a time” Minister of Education from the North. Note the disparity between cut off point for southern and northern students.
· Abia Male(130) Female (130)
· AkwaIbom Male(123), Female (123)
· Anambra Male(139) Female (139)
· Benue Male (111), Female (111)
· Bayelsa Male (72), Female (72)
· CrossRivers Male (97), Female (97)
· Delta Male (131), Female (131)
· Ebonyi Male (112), Female (112)
· Edo Male (127), Female (127)
· Ekiti Male (119), Female (119)
· Enugu Male (134), Female (1340
· Imo Male 9138), Female (138)
· Kogi Male (119), Female (119)
· Kwara Male (123), Female (123)
· Lagos Male (133), Female (133)
· Ogun Male (131), Female (131)
· Ondo Male (126), Female (126)
· Rivers Male (118), Female (118)
· Osun Male (127), Female (127)
· Oyo Male (127), Female (127)
· Plateau Male (97), Female (97)
· Yobe Male (20), Female (27)
· FCTAbuja Male (90), Female (90)
· Kaduna Male (91), Female (91)
· Nasarawa Male (58), Female 58)
· Niger Male (93), Female (93)
· Kano Male (67), Female (67)
· Katsina Male (60), Female (60)
· Adamawa Male (62) Female (62)
· Borno Male (45), Female (45)
· Gombe Male (58), Female (58)
· Jigawa Male(44), Female (44)
· Bauchi Male (35), Female (35)
· Kebbi Male (9), Female (20)
· Sokoto Male (9), Female (13)
· Taraba Male (3), Female (11)
· Zamfara Male (4), Female (2)
28. Contrary to the general belief - the biggest unifying factor in Nigeria is not football , but “Crude Oil”. Now note this: The very moment crude oil (in significant commercial quantity) is discovered in the North, that day will mark the beginning of the North’s agitation for a breakaway from the entity called Nigeria.
29. The Nigerian constitution was deliberately flawed and crafted to benefit the North.
30. Strangely, for a nation with vastly more ethic nationalities situated in the South, it is rather suspicious that Nigeria is divided along just regional lines – The North and the South. Now, of course,we all know which region this strange dichotomy favours.
31. The North is the region with the least education, least resources, least development and pervasive poverty – yet, they claim rulership of the nation by right (the “Born to rule” philosophy). In other words, the north must maintain all the undeserved advantages handed them by the British colonial masters and fortified by the North-controlled military political class between 1960 and 1999.
32. In the thinking of a typical Northerner, Arewa Northern Nigeria (not Nigeria) won the Nigerian civil war.
33. In defending a northern interest, if political logic fails, then religious antics and sentiments are stirred up by the Northerner leaders.
BONUS
The relocation of the nation’s capital from Lagos to Abuja was a deliberate plan of the Northern oligarchy (using the military) to situate the nation’s seat of power at the door-step of the Northerners. They, cleverly, gave Nigerians and the world the impression that everything was irreparably wrong with Lagos as the capital, and that to correct the impression, the capital would need to be situated in the heart of the northern region of Nigeria. To fulfill this arrangement - and give the relocation project an unbiased outlook - reputable Southerners (e.g. Late Justice Akinola Aguda and Tai Solarin) were recruited into the panel set up by the northern oligarchy.
WORD ON MARBLE:
“This new Nation called Nigeria should be an estate of our great grandfather, Uthman Dan Fodio. We must RUTHLESSLY prevent a change of power. We use the minorities in the north as willing tools, and the South, as conquered territory and never allow them to rule over us, and never allow them to have control over the future.” Sir Ahmadu Bello, Sardauna of Sokoto & Premier of Northern Region: The Parrot newspaper, October 12, 1960.
Now, who is the real fool here?

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